'Neck News - Vol. 2 Issue 6

REDNECK PHOTO of the DAY
 Real people, really!

Redneck high rise
REDNECK TECH LINGO
 Part 2
Keyboard - Where you hang the keys to the John Deere. 
Mac - Big Bubba's favorite fast food. 
Megahertz - How your head feels after 17 beers. 
Modem - What you do when the grass gets too high. 
Mouse Pad - Where Mickey and Minnie live. 
Network - Scooping up a big fish before it breaks the line. 
ROM - Where the pope lives. 
Screen - Keeps mosquitoes off the porch. 
Serial Port - A red wine you drink with breakfast. 
Superconductor - Amtrak's Employee of the year. 
SCSI (pronounced scuzzi) - What you call your week-old underwear.

REDNECK FUNNY

Dear Son,
I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you first left. Your Dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address as the last family here took the numbers with them for their next house, so they wouldn't have to change their address. This place has a washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in, pulled the chain, and I haven't seen 'em since. It only rained twice this week, three days the first time and four days this time. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt Sue sid it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with the heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it's a girl or a boy, so I don't know if you are an Aunt or and Uncle. Not much more news this time, write soon.

Love, Mom

P.S. Was going to send you money, but the envelope was already sealed.

YA KNOW YER A REDNECK IF...

The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights.
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